Fuse #8

Friday, February 23, 2007

Scrotem, Totem, Float 'Em, Note 'Em, Wrote 'Em, Vote 'Em

Nothing inspires the soul like a finely honed sense of indignation. Last Friday a Jo Knowles offered the following challenge: "Send me your scrotum poems! Or better yet, post them on your own blogs! Come on, you know you want to! Let's (figuratively) embrace the scrotum! Show the librarians and teachers who will use the book that we support them, and maybe inspire those who are on the fence to take a risk." I've mentioned in the past that poetry ain't my bag, baby. But that isn't to say I haven't heard a good one here and there.

The first is your haiku of the day:

The dog's glistening
scrotum a big Newbery problem
for small minds.
- Ed Cutler

From the child_lit listserv:

Two of my sons are home from school due to the holiday. One is 12 and the other is 7. I asked them if they would giggle if they heard their teacher read the word "scrotum" in a book. They both started giggling, and I asked the younger one if he knew what it meant, and he started singing, lustily, to the tune of the "Comet" parody:

"Scrotum; it is a piece of skin
Scrotum; it holds your testes in
Scrotum; don't overload'em
Or your scrotum will surely explodum."

And if that STILL isn't enough for you then I give you this from the Blue Rose Girls' Elaine Magliaro

BOOK TALK 2007: A Poem
Dressed in uniforms of blue,
The word police arrived at two.
With laser eyes, they scanned our pages
And locked our naughty words in cages.

Then up we cried: “You’ve taken text!
Will you remove our pictures next?”
“Your pictures?” one policeman said.
“We only take the stuff that’s read.

Your naughty words must be excised.
Let all your authors be advised
To watch their words when they compose
Their poetry…and all their prose.”

Warning given…the men in blue
Then turned to leave. They bid adieu.
We books now left with words deleted
Feel somehow, sadly, incompleted.

Who’s got a solution antidotal
For the current row o’er something scrotal?

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At 9:27 AM , Anonymous Nixie Knox said...

Here is the haiku I posted today on my blog:


Oh, delicate sack!
Pouch that holds the family jewels!
The scrotum, hooray!

At 11:38 AM , Blogger Dan McCoy said...


At 11:46 AM , Blogger Alkelda the Gleeful said...

I wonder if Lois Lowry's Anastasia Krupnik ever got so much controversy. Anastasia, after all, wanted to name her brother "One-Ball Reilly."

At 12:28 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

All this scrotum talk is just nuts, seriously ballsy writing. My friend Nad is outraged, he's going to write an op-ed. I say, "Go Nad" and Go Fusion#8!

At 1:08 PM , Blogger fusenumber8 said...

I am totally changing my name to Fusion #8. Sounds so much cooler on the page, doesn't it?

At 6:18 PM , Blogger Maryrose Wood said...

Sack the censors! Else,
A scrotum debate will test
Librarians' balls.

At 6:58 PM , Blogger Elaine Magliaro said...


I think we'll have to bestow upon you "The Best Totally Scrotally Blog Post Award" for this one!


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