I'm Not a Fan of the "Darndest Things" Phrase. However...
I'm a sucker for any blog that is able to replicate child dialogue in a funny and honest manner. Lots of blogs out there do it, but recently both Chicken Spaghetti AND Eric Berlin had some especially amusing tidbits. I don't usually do this, but you've gotta read what they wrote.
From Chicken Spaghetti:
Robert, smiling, to me: I have a girlfriend.
Jeffrey: You do?
Me: Is she in your class?
Robert: Yeah. But she doesn't like me.
Jeffrey: Who is it?
Robert: She doesn't even speak to me, but I still like her.
Robert: Daniela. But don't tell her. Please don't tell her.
Jeffrey, looking sad: I don't have a girlfriend. I don't like girls that much.
Robert: You like cars!
Jeffrey, face lighting up: Yeah. I like cars!
From Eric Berlin:
Dialogue from the back seat as we drove home from my office:
(At a red light.)
Alex: That’s the biggest truck ever! Hi, truck!
(Light turns green.)
Alex: Bye, truck! Bye bye! See you next week!
Lea: You don’t talk to stuff. You only talk to people!
Alex: Bye! Bye, truck!
Lea: No! You don’t talk to stuff! You only talk to people! Not stuff!
(Silence. A small, perfectly calibrated silence.)
Alex: (loudly) Goodbye, trees!
The best part of this is, I really think Alex was making a joke, playing off his demanding little sister. He cracked up after saying “Goodbye, trees!” — that kind of kid’s laugh where you start to worry about how long the human body can go without breathing. I’m not saying he’s ready to start writing for Letterman, but if he really was making a joke, needless to say, that is totally awesome.